English II

Body Revision
Follow the directions below for the completion of the body paragraphs revision assignment for Unit VII. If you have questions, please email your professor for assistance.
Purpose: The purpose of this assignment is to revise the body of your academic argumentative research paper, which you created a draft of in Unit VI.
Description: In this assignment, you will revise the three to four body paragraphs you wrote in Unit VI. The following requirements must be included in the assignment:

Body Paragraphs: You will revise the body section of your paper based on feedback received from your professor in Unit VI. Please review here the guidelines for the body section of your research paper: This section will include three to four paragraphs comprised of five to seven sentences each. Each paragraph should be between 150-200 words. At a minimum, this portion of the paper should be 450-600 words (for three to four paragraphs); a body section of this length will meet the minimum requirements of the assignment. Revisions must be substantive and should be made in accordance with the direction given by the professor’s feedback. The following components must be included in each body paragraph (in the following order).

Sentence 1: Point/reason sentence: This topic sentence will contain one of your reasons.
Sentence 2: Explanation: In this sentence, you will provide information that further develops or explains Sentence 1.
Sentence 3: Illustration: This sentence introduces evidence that supports the reason that is presented in Sentence 1.
Sentence 4: Explanation of the illustration: Because the evidence does not necessarily stand on its own, you need to provide explanation so that the reader will understand how you interpreted the evidence to come to your reason.
Sentences 5-6: Second illustration and explanation (optional): You may choose to include a second piece of evidence that is then followed by an explanation.
Last Sentence: Transition: In this sentence, you will signal to the reader that you will be moving on to another point in the next paragraph. You do this to ease the movement from one point to another.

Be sure to include the introduction and literature review you have already created and revised.
Use APA conventions to cite and reference all sources used to support your argument

( PROFESSOR‘S FEEDBACK)
Freeda, Good first draft. Below I’ve provided an outline to help you with revisions for your body paragraphs as well as your thesis statement, so the two components tie together well. Additionally, please review the two handouts that provide a guide for editing and revising your work. Review this tutorial on formatting your reference page: https://columbiasouthern.adobeconnect.com/_a1174888831/references2014/ First, revise your thesis statement to be a “because” clause. Your thesis statement should include not only your argument/position on your topic, but also justify — the ‘because’ part – your argument with three supporting reasons. For example: Expanding a lottery system into Alabama will improve the quality of life in the State  [stating my argument] because [signaling the justification] increase funds for education, revenue to fund addiction services and new job development [3 specific reasons]. Second, each well-developed body paragraph will address one reason each, using outside sources to support your reason. Example Para #1, With a comparatively small population and high levels of poverty in the state, raising funds for schools through traditional taxes has not proved successful, however, a lottery would be able to supplement the state’s education funds. According to the Council of State Governments (2017), Alabama loses approximately $250 million dollars per year with residents purchasing lottery tickets in neighboring states. Many states around the country designate their lottery revenues to untouchable education funds to benefit schools. With an extra $250 mil., Alabama could fully fund its pre-K program, making it possible for all four-year olds to attend, with enough money left over to also provide an approximately ten percent increase in overall funding to the State’s two-year and four -year colleges and universities (Powell Crain, 2018). Improvements to both pre-K and higher education alone, make it possible to ensure greater future success for students throughout the state, which can yield higher paying jobs, more money into the tax-base, and improved local communities. You will then continue the remaining two or three paragraphs. Handouts: Revising Sentences for Conciseness.pdf Tips to Make Your Writing Sound More Formal.pdf 

SEE ATTACHED WORK TO BE REVISED